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Who vs whom: part 2

Ready? Brain engaged? 🧠

Let’s go:

Whom is used as the OBJECT of the sentence (both directly and indirectly).

Think of ‘whom’ as: me, him, her, us, them.

👀Whom did you see?

💘My boyfriend, whom I love so much, has just bought me a pizza oven. 🍕

🚗My personal chauffeur, whom we just hired, failed to show up to work today.


Think of ‘Whom’ as a person, but a far lazier person than ‘Who’, who spent the first post making and eating lots of cakes.

Things seem to happen to ‘Whom’ without them having to ‘do’ anything much.

So:

👀Whom did you see? > Whom is being seen here, not doing the seeing.

💖💘Whom I love so much > Whom is being loved, not doing the loving (….selfish).

👨‍✈️Whom we just hired > Whom has been hired, not doing the hiring.


❗❗Top tip: when in doubt, substitute me / him / her / us / them (but rearrange the word order) like this:

❓Who / whom should I call first? > should I call her first? vs: should I call she first?

Which one sounds right? Yep:

✅should I call her first = whom should I call first?

Who / whom ate my sandwich? > he ate my sandwich? vs: him ate my sandwich?

Which one sounds right?

✅He ate my sandwich = who ate my sandwich?

I could go on.

However, two final thoughts:

🟣 If you think the ‘whom’ examples sound awkward or a bit prim, you are not alone**. Most people don’t use ‘whom’ in casual speech or writing and THAT IS OK! Some people only use it in well-established phrases such as ‘to whom it may concern’ and THAT IS OK. It is more and more acceptable to read and hear sentences like this: 👇👇

Who do you believe? (it should be: whom do you believe, because: I believe her)

🟣If you are going to use ‘whom’ and ‘who’, GET IT RIGHT and BE CONSISTENT. ✅✅

Using it ‘to sound posh’ doesn’t work if you’re going to get it wrong. It has the completely opposite effect and lets your message down.


**If I’m being honest, I don’t really like using ‘whom’ but if I do use it, I always run through the substitute scenario in my head first to check it. If you want to use it but aren’t sure – I am sure. I can help you.



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